The Family Cycle of Poverty- CAN BE BROKEN!
I honestly can’t believe I am finally doing this. I never thought, initially, I would be as successful as I am now. Am I finished? Is that all I can accomplish? NO! However, my childhood, as family cycle would suggest, looked different. See, I grew up in a broken home. My mother had three children, my sister, the oldest; my brother, the middle child; and myself, the baby. My brother and sister have a different father and I could never find it in myself to call them half brother or sister – they are my only family. My mom had divorced my father before I could remember. My father, we will call him, Al, was in and out of jail most of my childhood, and was addicted to alcohol and used illegal substances. I only shared a short time with him in my elementary years, and haven’t been able to connect since. His story is much more heartbreaking than my own as he was in and out of foster homes, and many family members were addicted to alcohol and or drugs.
My mother had my sister while still being a Senior in High School and one year later had my brother. She was unable to pursue that American dream of going to college or gaining a skill set at that time because her responsibilities of being a parent stole that from her. Now don’t get me wrong – my mother did the best she could as she herself was raised in a broken home and her siblings became victim to alcohol, drugs, and jail time. One of her husbands, and my step father for most of my child and adolescent years was addicted to cocaine. However, I can write this and PROUDLY say my sister, brother, and myself broke the family poverty cycle.
Did I question why I was never able to be blessed with a loving functional family? All the time. I would see posts on Facebook and Instagram of families, family gatherings, and holidays – it would make me sad and depressed. I used to be so ashamed of my past – I would try and hide it. What is so appealing about a girl who couldn’t invite friends over because there was no electricity. A girl that was bullied over her clothes. A family who lived off of public assistance and food pantry baskets. I lived on my own since I was 17 – and it has taken me years to realize my message can help others because it now emboldens me to do better.
For a long time I wondered how my siblings and I broke the family cycle of poverty, drugs, alcoholism, or criminal mischief. Each time I would think of a point in my childhood that changed me – it was Christmas – I was 8 years old – and there were no presents under the tree. I remember the week before being upset, sullen, and indifferent. About two days before Christmas – FINALLY – there were gifts, for me under the tree. Two gifts – Two. I never appreciated a Christmas more so than that day. I am now 32 years old – and I can still tell you what I received for gifts that year; a bracelet making kit and a sand art kit. The days following Christmas I made many bracelets and filled the plastic animal shapes with many different colors of sand. My mother still has one of these – a parakeet that she even put a feather in the topper. I wouldn’t find who gifted those two parcels of hope until many years later – The Salvation Army.
This story came full circle for me as just this past December I was honored to speak at the Clearfield Salvation Army’s Kettle Kickoff – where I spoke of our family struggles as a child and the gifts I received that changed my narrative. An older lady came up to me afterwards to tell me she specifically remembers those kits and that she helped hand them out to families. She is one of my angels – my ray of hope. A volunteer who took time out of her schedule – to unknowingly changed a family cycle that had repeated itself for many generations. That is the work of Community Empowerment. Giving back to others to empower them – help them succeed – open their eyes to kindness and generosity.
My story doesn’t end there – it’s one that needs to be heard and I hope that it empowers others. I encourage you to start using the hashtag #communityempowerment in each kind deed you do. We have to be the change that builds up our youth, our community, and each other.
~Stay tuned~
Amanda
#thesalvationarmy #volunteer #breakingthefamilycycle #poverty #positivity #nevergiveup
Her Boots 